I’ve had all week off from work in honor of my visitors, JJ and Charrow. They left yesterday and I have today off because I’m not good at reconciling time off requests with calendars, but it’s good because I need a mental health day to get over the absence of two dear friends in my little apartment.

Yesterday after the left, I ended up eating my leftover El Myr (pronounced “El Meer”) burrito and then taking a four-hour nap, then going to yoga, then eating a lot of potato chips that JJ left for me. When I’m home all day, I have a tendency to eat too much and sleep too much, which is the reason I try to to spend time at coffee shops. They charge you to eat and would probably kick you out if you slept. (Though not in all cases, as evidenced by the homeless guy who buys cups of water and then dozes in a chair for 15 minutes or so, and I’ve never seen him reprimanded, and he never bothers anyone.) So today, I came to the coffee shop near my apartment to work on a project that is not exciting, but that I’m not ready to disclose to the public, just because.

This coffee shop has free wifi (well, with a purchase), but they ask you to choose an amount of time you plan to spend online, then they’ll print you a code that you enter on the login site, and your computer disconnects when the time is up. It’s kind of inconvenient, and I’ll be honest, it’s also what prevents me from stealing their wifi, because I live that close. Anyway, I came today to work on something that didn’t require the internet, but I just felt better having the internet available. I was just using Microsoft Word, and really, I could have written in a notebook and typed it up later, if we’re being honest. Moose understands.

So, I typed away, writing a paragraph (or less), then reading a blog or two, writing a few more sentences, then checking Facebook. And then my 60-minute session ended (the barista dude said they were out of longer sessions, but I could request another hour-long one, which I don’t understand), and I meandered back up to the counter, wondering if the baristas could all see that my internetting did include about 5% of relevant research along with 95% fluff. What if they could say, “No, you came here to work on a Real Document, and we saw you on Flickr. No internet for you!” What happened, of course, was that I asked, “Can I get a refill on internet please?” and chuckled at myself, and the guy said, “Of course,” and handed me a new code for 60 more minutes that I really don’t need. (Or that I need for blogging, apparently.)

And then I had the idea that if this internet portioning out system exists, the coffee shop should also offer to block certain websites to ensure that the patrons really will stay on task. And then I realized that it’s called “school or workplace with blocked websites,” or “unplugging your home internet if you’re old-fashioned and have a modem.”

Next time, be sure to ask me about the time that I invented libraries.

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